Reflection- Unit 2

As I reflect on the audio file for the autogenic training technique or "suggestive thinking" I am reminded of how powerful our mind is when we allow it to open beyond our norm. After listening I was able to relax and actually listened to it twice. Within the last 5 years my physical, mental, and emotional health has gone from good to bad and then to worse. As you may have read in my previous posting I chose to become a stay-at-home wife and mother after many years of nursing. I just knew in my gut that being home with my family was going to alleviate all the stressors that had occurred because I worked outside the home. I was going to be able to have the laundry done, cooked our meals, enjoy watching my children grow, and build a stronger relationship with my husband, and help manage our family farming business. Shortly after starting my new full-time job, I became depressed, irritable, and often felt like I was being taken advantage of by my family and friends. Evidently when you become a “domestic engineer” society sees you sitting at home watching soap operas and eating Bon-Bons. I am busier now than when I had a full time job. What the BLEEEP! I quit working so I would have less stress. Now I was back in the same crazy boat but in a different profession. With my educational background I knew there had to be more to life than taking anti-depressants and crying myself to sleep because I was so exhausted. In 2009, I had my “ah-ha” moment. I realized that yes I lived by a schedule, as most mothers do, but that schedule was by no means prioritized. Why did I quit my job? To strengthen my marriage, enjoy my children, and reduce my stress level. What have I done to better these areas of my life? Quit my job. That was it. All I had done was quit my job. I had not done anything to feel closer to my husband and we were both feeling the tension. Our children are so active we are constantly on the go which means that my domestic duties are often time left undone. Add being a college student and managing a family business to that at you have a full blown circus. It was time for a change. I had to reorganize my family…not just myself. It was during this transition, that we all realized that being MOM does not give your superhero strength. We are a family unit and everyone has a role- yes even our 4 year old. I take time for myself at least 30 minutes every day. This means no kids, no husband, no school, NOTHING. I take time with my husband as we have agreed on date night once a week. This has allowed us to go out together without our children and just be “us”. It gives us both something to look forward to throughout the week. Finally, I’m enjoying my children so much more. It may sound odd, but I set aside time for my children, together and separately. I do this because one is 4 and the other 12 which means they need their mother in different ways. When we are all together as a family, they have my undivided attention. As a parent, or just as an individual, we need to be reminded that we cannot change the past and we cannot control the future, all we have is today, so enjoy it. We can’t expect to see positive changes in our life if we continue the same negative patterns. When I wake up in the morning I now start my day by choosing to be happy. No one can make that decision for me… I’m in control!